The series has a simple premise but was funny enough to keep many laughing for seven seasons. It lives on through its reruns, fans, and incredible Parks and Recreation quotes. But just because a show’s over doesn’t mean that it’s really over. I’m Ron F***ing Swanson.When we said goodbye to the sitcom Parks and Rec, we said goodbye to a wondrous world called Pawnee, Indiana, home to some of the most memorable characters to ever grace our screens, including the one and only Leslie Knope. And women are brought to him, maybe… when he desires them.” The man is chosen based on some kind of IQ test, and maybe also a physical tournament, like a decathlon. “My idea of a perfect government is one guy who sits in a small room at a desk, and the only thing he’s allowed to decide is who to nuke. Don’t teach a man to fish…and feed yourself. “Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Anything more and this becomes figure skating.” “Keep your tears in your eyes where they belong.” What I said was: ‘Give me all the bacon and eggs you have’. I worry what you just heard was: ‘Give me a lot of bacon and eggs’. “Just give me all the bacon and eggs you have. Try not to hurt anyone who doesn’t deserve it.” (Photo: NBCUniversal Television Distribution) “One rage every three months is permitted. “It’s always a good idea to demonstrate to your coworkers that you are capable of withstanding a tremendous amount of pain.” “Any dog under fifty pounds is a cat and cats are useless.” If you want to experience other ‘cultures,’ use an atlas or a ham radio.” “It’s pointless for a human to paint scenes of nature when they can go outside and stand in it.” I’d work all night, if it meant nothing got done.” But I will do something if it helps someone else do nothing. “Normally, if given the choice between doing something and nothing, I’d choose to do nothing. I am going to consume all of this at the same time because I am a free American.” It’s a 16-ounce T-bone and a 24-ounce porterhouse. It’s like yoga, except I still get to kill something.” “On my deathbed, my final wish is to have my ex-wives rush to my side so I can use my dying breath to tell them both to go to hell one last time.” “Capitalism: God’s way of determining who is smart and who is poor.” (Photo: NBCUniversal Television Distribution) “Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets.” “Strippers do nothing for me… but I will take a free breakfast buffet anytime, anyplace.” “I’m not interested in caring about people.” Nick Offerman tour 2019: how to get tickets for the Ron Swanson actor’s UK shows Zero stars.” (Photo: NBCUniversal Television Distribution) “ Dear frozen yogurt, you are the celery of desserts. “Tom, put all my records into this rectangle. “Put some alcohol in your mouth to block with words from coming out.” I like pretty, dark-haired women, and breakfast food.” My Mom’s name is Tamara… she goes by Tammy.” “Sting like a bee, but do not float like a butterfly. “There has never been a sadness that can’t been cured by breakfast food.” “Under my tutelage, you will grow from boys to men. “I’d wish you the best of luck but I believe luck is a concept created by the weak to explain their failures.” Do not stand too close when you light an ex-wife effigy.” “The key to burning an ex-wife effigy is to dip it in paraffin wax and then toss the flaming bottle of isopropyl alcohol from a safe distance. Which is water that is lying about being milk.” “There’s only one thing I hate more than lying: skim milk. Swanson doesn’t care if you agree with his musings, so in the words of the great man himself, “Keep your tears in your eyes where they belong.”
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